FUNNY PEOPLE(素敵な人生の終わり方)その14

その15へ   英語目次   蠅太郎マンガ美術館

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I'll come up with the ending. But that was good.

オチは自分で考えるよ。

 【英語徒然】オレなりに、中学高校、そして予備校でと、英語は半端でないくらい勉強して、偏差値だって60以上はとり、結果として、国公立の医学部に入ったのだから、ちょっとしたものだと思うのだ。でも、英会話ができるとはちっとも思っていない。だから、こんなものを書いている、勉強しているのだが。

Come up withだって、けっこう受験英語では重要な単語で、なじみはあるのだが、「追いつく」という意味では理解していたが、「解答を見つけ出す」それが転じて、「(オチは)自分で考える」という風に使われているとは、新鮮に感じた。

 こんな場面で、自分が言うのなら、I'll try to think.とでも、日本人風に言うのだろうか。thinkってあまり使わないようだ。日本人はthink好きだぞ。でも、こんな言い方を覚えておけば、英会話能力がグッと広がるはずだ。

 つまり、ここにギャップがある。

 I'll come up with the ending. なんとか訳ができた。何を言っているか分かった。でもそれで留めてはいけない。言うときには、I'll try to think.でも言うさ。という考え方ではいけない。次にこれを話すのだ、と言う気持ちで覚えてしまう。すると、話もできるし、このように言われても聞こえてくるようになるだろう。ギャップが埋まった。このようにして、英会話力が進歩していくのだ。いや、進歩をもたらすのは、このようなやり方しかないのではないか。それをオレは一番言いたいね。

 come up with : 追いつく 提供する (解答などを)見つけ出す

-

Can we just forget I did this? Ignore it, I'll erase it, okay?

私がこれをしたことを忘れてくれませんか。それを無視してください。私はそれを消去します。

-

Let's just hear what’s going to cheer me up. This is good. Come on, what else do you got?

何が私を励ましてくれるのか聞かせてくれ。

励ます cheer up

-

Just write me some jokes you stupid, fucking idiot.

いくつかのジョークを私に書きなさい。バカたれめ。

バカたれめ というのはstupid idiotとかfucking idiotと言う言い方をする

-

41 INT. GEORGE'S OFFICE - NIGHT 41

George walks in strumming his guitar and singing. Ira's working at his computer.

-

GEORGE

(singing)

Don't call me Weener, My name is Whiner, my name is Whiner. Don't call me Weener. Whatever.

-

George sits and puts the guitar down.

-

GEORGE (CONT’D)

You got any jokes for me, dumb

dumb?

-

IRA

Got some good ones I think, actually. I have a thing about how you're rich and so you bought a private jet but you're afraid of flying, so you just drive in it.

-

GEORGE

Oh that's funny.

-

IRA

You just go to drive-thrus and car washes?

-

47.

39 CONTINUED: (3) 39

(CONTINUED)

-

GEORGE

Yeah, yeah. I'll come up with the ending. But that was good.

オチは自分で考えるよ。

 【英語徒然】オレなりに、中学高校、そして予備校でと、英語は半端でないくらい勉強して、偏差値だって60以上はとり、結果として、国公立の医学部に入ったのだから、ちょっとしたものだと思うのだ。でも、英会話ができるとはちっとも思っていない。だから、こんなものを書いている、勉強しているのだが。Come up withだって、けっこう受験英語では重要な単語で、なじみはあるのだが、「追いつく」という意味では理解していたが、「解答を見つけ出す」それが転じて、「(オチは)自分で考える」という風に使われているとは、新鮮に感じた。

 こんな場面で、自分が言うのなら、I’ll try to think.とでも、日本人風に言うのだろうか。thinkってあまり使わないようだ。日本人はthink好きだぞ。でも、こんな言い方を覚えておけば、英会話能力がグッと広がるはずだ。

 つまり、ここにギャップがある。

 I’ll come up with the ending. なんとか訳ができた。何を言っているか分かった。でもそれで留めてはいけない。言うときには、I’ll try to think.でも言うさ。という考え方ではいけない。次にこれを話すのだ、と言う気持ちで覚えてしまう。すると、話もできるし、このように言われても聞こえてくるようになるだろう。ギャップが埋まった。このようにして、英会話力が進歩していくのだ。いや、進歩をもたらすのは、このようなやり方しかないのではないか。それをオレは一番言いたいね。

 come up with : 追いつく 提供する (解答などを)見つけ出す

-

IRA

I thought it would be funny about how you're getting older and you found the first gray hair on your balls and it really worries you, but then your realized that it was good because it made your balls look distinguished and smart. Like if you gave your balls a little tweed jacket with elbow pads and a little pipe, your balls could be like a character Kevin Kline would play in a movie.

-

GEORGE

Yeah, that's funny. I could do that. What else you got?

-

IRA

Actually, this just kind of happened. I, uh, I'm making you an iTunes playlist.

-

GEORGE

For what?

-

IRA

Sometimes when I'm upset, music makes me feel a little better. So I thought maybe...

-

GEORGE

Oh, it's a cheer me up thing?

-

IRA

I was just going to put it on your iPod. I don't have to play it right now.

-

GEORGE

For what?  For when I go out jogging?  Let me hear it.  I don't jog anymore.  Let me hear my playlist, Ira.

Ira hits play.  Bob Marley's “Three Little Birds” comes on.

-

48.

41 CONTINUED: 41

(CONTINUED)

-

GEORGE (CONT’D)

Bob Marley.  He thinks everything's going to be alright.  Bob Marley had cancer.  Everything wasn't alright for Bob Marley.  He dead now.  What else did you put on there for me?

-

IRA

I really don't want to do this, George.  Can we just forget I did this? Ignore it, I'll erase it, okay?

私がこれをしたことを忘れてくれませんか。それを無視してください。私はそれを消去します。

-

GEORGE

No, let’s just hear what’s going to cheer me up. This is good. Come on, what else do you got?

何が私を励ましてくれるのか聞かせてくれ。

励ます cheer up

-

IRA

Okay, here’s the next one.

-

Ira plays “(I've had) The Time of My Life” from Dirty Dancing. Ira lip-syncs along with the song.

-

GEORGE

I don't know what to say to that one. That's just fifth grade. Showing me your cock was

embarrassing, but this is okay?

-

IRA

That's a good song.

-

GEORGE

What else? Give me more. This is unbelievable.

-

IRA

Are you sure you want to hear another one?

-

GEORGE

Yeah, this is fun to be cheered up.

-

Ira plays the next song. Warren Zevon's “Keep Me in Your Heart” comes on. George listens to a couple of lines. He tries not to let it get to him.

-

IRA

I'm sorry.

-

49.

41 CONTINUED: (2) 41

(CONTINUED)

-

GEORGE

Just write me some jokes you stupid, fucking idiot.

いくつかのジョークを私に書きなさい。バカたれめ。

バカたれめ というのはstupid idiotとかfucking idiotと言う言い方をする

-

IRA

Okay, I'm sorry.

-

COMEDY PERFORMANCE MONTAGE

44 INT. COMEDY CLUB - NIGHT 44

George performs stand up.

-

GEORGE

So I'm not married. I don't think I'm ever going to get married. I can't find a reason to do it, you know. I've got friends like, “You've got to get married. My wife, she’s the best cook. The best. You've gotta...” And I'm like “My cook's the best cook.” “But my wife, she's my best friend.” “My cook's actually a pretty good guy.”

-

INT. GEORGE'S HOUSE - NIGHT

George and Ira are writing jokes for George's act.

-

IRA

This could be pretty funny. Your dad didn't like you, so he named you and your dog

-

George.

INT. COMEDY CLUB - NIGHT

George performs Ira's joke, doing his “Dad” voice.

-

GEORGE

“Hey, George, come in here! Not you, the dog.”

-

INT. GEORGE'S HOUSE - NIGHT

Ira does George's Dad voice, pitching on the joke.

-

50.

41 CONTINUED: (3) 41

(CONTINUED)

-

IRA

“George, look at this awesome book

I just got!” And then you come in and he says, “Not you, the dog.”

-

GEORGE

That's funny.

-

INT. COMEDY CLUB - NIGHT

George continues on stage...

-

GEORGE

“Hey, George, I made a nice steak for you!” “Hey, thanks dad.” “Not you, the dog.

Hey George, I just put some peanut butter on my balls, come lick it up! You. Fuckhead.”

-

45 INT. COMEDY CLUB - NIGHT 45

Ira does stand up.

-

IRA

Airplanes are the last public place where you can fart as loud as you want and no one cares. It's loud, there's engine noise, they just don't know it's you. You can literally be talking to someone you just met and be sitting this far away from them and look them dead in the eyes as they talk about their grandson, and just fart as loud as you humanly can.  Just blllllaaahh. “Yeah, where's your grandson from,” bllllaahhh. “My asshole's been open this whole time.”

-

INT. COMEDY CLUB - LATER

George and Ira stand in the wings.

-

IRA

Can you help me with some of my jokes when I drop you off later?

-

51.

CONTINUED:

(CONTINUED)

-

GEORGE

Help you with some of your bits?

-

IRA

Yeah.

-

GEORGE

No. I'm not going to help you, man. No one helped me when I started.

Fuck it, I'm not paying to help you, I'm paying you to help me.

-

INT. IMPROV COMEDY CLUB - NIGHT

George performs.

-

GEORGE

There is always the one girl out there, though. The one that got away. Guys have that, and serial killers have that. The one that got away. “I had her. The trunk was lined with garbage bags, and then she got away.”

-

INT. COMEDY CLUB - NIGHT

Daisy performs.

-

DAISY

I'm sick of rap songs telling me what to do. “Bend over, slap your ass, girl. Drop it like it's hot.” I'm going to write a song back and be like, “Boy, brush your teeth.

Yeah, boy, bump that jacket off your back, I'm fucking cold as shit.”

-

INT. COMEDY CLUB - NIGHT

Ira performs. He's getting better.

-

IRA

I masturbate so much with hand cream, I forget people use it for shit other than masturbating.

-

52.

CONTINUED:

(MORE)

(CONTINUED)

-

When I'm in public and see someone pull out hand cream, I'm like,

“This guy's about to jerk off!”

-

INT. COMEDY CLUB - LATER

George and Ira stand in the wings.

-

GEORGE

Can I ask you something?  Is your act just designed to make sure that no girl will ever sleep with you again? All you fucking talk about is jacking off and farting. You think a girl's going to come up to you after the show, “Oh, could you just jack off on me and then fart in my face?” It's fucking insane. Do you want to get laid ever?

jack off = masterbate

-

INT. IMPROV CLUB - NIGHT

George sits at the piano and sings an improvised song about his life in comedy and his relationship with the audience.

MONTAGE:

INT. GEORGE’S BATHROOM - LATER

George shaves. Stares at himself in the mirror. He looks terrible.

-

INT. GEORGE’S BATHROOM - LATER

George sits in the shower, feeling sick.

INT. HOSPITAL - LATER

Blood is drawn from George's arm.

-

INT. GEORGE’S BATHROOM - LATER

George lies on the floor, hugging the toilet. Ira sits next to him, taking care of him.

-

53.

CONTINUED:

IRA (CONT'D)

-

(CONTINUED)

George gets up on his knees and throws up. Ira tries to comfort him and pats his back.

-

EXT. GEORGE'S HOUSE - NIGHT

George swims laps. He gasps for breath, his eyes bloodshot.

END MONTAGE

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